I found my dream, finally. Through months and weeks of dwelling within. The lack of that sugar rush I always loved felt bad. I need that surge of endorphins. Dissatisfaction is self acclaimed. I will probably only discover contentment when I truly understand the beauty of living. Happiness doesn't have to sprout from materialistic gains. It could be that simple kind gesture, that warm smile, and casual greeting that really makes your day, though sometimes delicacies do encourage the same results.

I've found my dream job; and its nothing about making big bucks and living life to the standards set by the rich and the famous on teevee. and only Then, will I ever seek the contentment I have crazily been pursuing. Meanwhile, working hard will only be my second best alternative.

am I happy? no.
am I unhappy? no.
I am. just not happy. but not unhappy.

Sylvia. Syl. And someone you'll never expect me to be.