I'm starting to take baby steps towards another route in life.

Stood firm in decisions I've made recently - just wondering how these decisions could have changed my life entirely if I decided otherwise, and how it would have affected the people around me.

I'm starting to discover real, true love. Not a boy-girl relationship kinda thing. I'm talking about love - for my friends, my peers, strangers, colleagues, elders, relatives, family, school, environment, food, modules, happenings, strangers, or just the world.

It struck me just yesterday. I told 2 people I was a little upset that I couldn't find a way to care or be there for them, just as they had for me. Felt like I was a bad friend.

Then I wondered.

Why would I feel bad? Why do I insist on doing something for them? Why did I have to persist to find out if they lack something or were in need of something they don't have?

Then I concluded somehow, that maybe, I wasn't capable enough to be there for them. Maybe I was just not mature enough to handle their problems. Maybe I was never there at the right moments to be by their side. Or maybe, I haven't listened enough.

So now. I thought the best way to be a good friend - was to be stronger. Be braver. Be more capable. Grow up. Be always there for them when they need somebody. Listen even more. And keep them dear by me.

I hope I can be better. For better or worse. And I'm really really glad they've stood by me.

Treasuring the things around me as much as I can. I hope I'm not holding on too much.
Right now, I just need a spurt of courage and boost in confidence to do what I need to do.

So many people with hopes placed on me. What happens if I choose to let them down? Will I ever do that? Sometimes I feel like one day I might do something so darn irresponsible like that to kick myself in the butt and drown myself in shame and misery.

Just a thought. I'll work hard I hope.

Christmas Party.
Fund Raisers.
Camps.
Sports.
Competitions.
Projects.
Life. <3!
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