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Scribbling [a] Runaway History


Like Shakespeare in Love


Hello (:

I'm Sylvia. I enjoy the company of good friends and food.
I'm currently,
serving as a chair at Teck Ghee Youth Executive Committee;
chasing dreams at Molehill;
and doing Marketing & Public Relations at Levitate Studios.

Join my endeavors with the following:
Singapore Open Gaming Convention 2015
SG50 Countdown Party @ Bishan Park
via Teck Ghee YEC and social media!

Drop a note and say hello if you'd like! (:
my Instagram
my Facebook
my Twitter
Email me.


Sylvia Phua
Sylvia Phua
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Saturday, 23 January 2010
A resentful solution.
I finally understand why many people love sleeping.
Sleeping is healthy, peaceful, and a carefree way of passing time. You just close your eyes, and almost immediately, you're rid of all the troubles of your life.

Or maybe, thats just what i think. Sleeping seems to be the best solution I've found to cast aside my worries for some time and just find peace.

Though occassionally my new found worries and troubles may seep into my dreams through the loopholes of my subconscience, facing them in peace seems to be a better option for me, than dealing with them in reality.

Escaping reality was never my emergency escape route. But now, I can only conclude I took a wrong turn and ended up at the wrong place. Unfamiliar, unaccompanied, totally afraid.

Fear seems to have also taken up many definitions in my vocabulary bank. Weakness overwhelms me more than ever.
I swore to myself to walk with full stride, and a heart of courage, but it was just that - that I lacked.

Maybe sleeping will work again. Or I'll have to show myself how much more I'm worth before I can find my place in the world once more. Life was so much easier on the right track. Foolish turns and notorious misbehavior turned me away from where I was initially headed.

Now, finding my way back is going to take me 3 times the period, and an endless amount of suffering and pain.
Smiles and laughter may persist in my case, but they would all be just an empty nutcase trying to let loose.
Numbness. Helplessness. Pain. Guilt.
That sums up everything already.

If only I could convince myself, that life was still beautiful. Then maybe life would be, beautiful.
But is it?